I really need to get my bitch-tionary up and running because there are so many things i need to reference to that can be found there ::sigh:: not enough hours in the day.
I was walking home today and whenever i walk my mind seems to notice and store things more vividly than normal. It could be from the oxygenation of cells, the fact that you don't really need to focus on walking, or my minds own personal way of functioning superbly. Two interesting things worth of notation happened, one of which is a most irritable event that no one should have to be subject to. We'll get to that in a moment.
First, I was strolling along and the potent scent of freeze pops filled my nostrils. Not just normal pops, but
Otter Pops. If you are not familar with them, they are your typical style packaged pop. Plastic sleeve filled with frozen sugary delight, usually coming in a carboard box of about 50 pops. The main difference between
Otter Pops and say Pop-Ice Pops are the cartoon characters associated with each pops flavor that are printed on the plastic sleeve, such as: Strawberry Short Kook, Alexander the Grape, & Poncho Punch. The other main difference is that these pops have KILLER flavor to them. They are by far the creme de la creme of freeze pops.
So as i walked enjoying the scent-sations i begin to hear small elfin voices giggling and carrying on. Then i begin to notice the freeze pop wrappers littering the sidewalk like a trail. As i rounded the corner there they were. Three very young children covered head to toe in the sticky remains of melted pops, sitting in an inflatable pool, and roughly 30 plastic sleeves before them on the sidewalk. I smiled to them, they smiled back and i was immediately flooded with childhood memories of very much the same scene as i was viewing. I love memories. I love reliving memories. I hate having my memories interrupted by THE STATIC BUMP....::play sinister music here::
This is where the irritation comes in.
The STATIC BUMP is one of the most annoying events in the world. Almost everyone loves music. Almost everyone enjoys playing their favorite songs loudly. Almost everyone listens to music when they drive. Summer is a particularly popular season to have your windows wide open and your music cranked up. This is all fine and dandy unless you have the STATIC BUMP. If you haven't guessed it by now, the SB is when you happen upon an automobile whose owner thinks that just because its a good song they can blast the hell out of it on their shitty ass stereo system and rupture the fragile eardrums of everyone in the vincinity. It is one thing to blast a great song and have the stereo system to back the blast up, it is quite another to violate the the air with warbled, irritating music that A. Sounds like a compilation of "the chipmunks live from under the sea" B. Has bass that can be compared to your elderly relative who has irritable bowel syndrome or C. Emits only from the front speakers on your dash or in your door.
I'm sure you have all experienced this. Unfortunately i had to endure 2 full blocks of the SB in the middle of my reminiscing. It sucked. I saw the car coming for me, it was easily picked out by the rusted out front fender and the red,white, & blue ribbons streaming from the front antenna. A sickening feeling entered my stomach as the "hoopdie" approached. Have i mentioned i have no shame nor fear at all? Well i don't. That being said, can you guess what i did?
The car finally came to the stop sign at the end of the block just as i had reached it. I could see two younger males (21/22?) inside so i waved them over. They rolled up with huge smiles on their faces probably assuming they were going to be hit on or complimented for their musical choice (In Da Club-50 Cent) Little did they know what was to befall them.
I leaned in all sexy-like to the passenger side and in my sexiest voice requested the driver to lower the volume so we could speak. He did. I smiled slowly with the tip of my tongue gently peeking out for more of a distraction and then I said "If you think i am trying to pick you up you are sadly mistaken. I merely waved you over to tell you that though you may think you are the coolest m'fers in the history of men, you need to either get a decent stereo system to honor the music which you play or stop listening to music in your car at top volume. What you are doing now is a major offense to the artist and the public whom you subject to your shitty stereo. It is not our fault that you have to drive this car. It is also not our fault if you cannot afford decent speakers. My suggestion is to leave the volume at the current level and drive immediately to <insert store name> and get some decent equipment or face the imminent fact that you will NEVER get chicks with your current tactics." They both just sat there, mouths gaping at the fact that i just unleashed this upon them. As i leaned out of the window and began to bid them a good day, another car turned the corner with a killer system and a great song filling up the street. I winked at the pair, pointed to the car and said "See HE knows the rules about bumpin your ride," and i walked up the street.
I did not hear their stereo volume go back up. I am assuming they can't believe i stopped them to say that. I doubt any other person would've done what i did, but maybe if we each informed someone of their massacre of music in this form, the world might be a better place.
Until my mind reeks of thought again,
::Miss P::
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Today is Typewriter Day. In honor of the first patent on the typewriter ... wait, what's a typewriter? Is that anything like a keyboard? Okay, now we're talking. Using the letters K-E-Y-B-O-A-R-D tell us something about your blog or your blogging habits.
K-Kind of random
E-Everchanging layouts (heh)
Y-Yes, i am slightly insane
B-Broad rang of subjects
O-Often spontaneous
A-Always relative to my life
R-Random thought patterns
D-Daringly different
This week's hump -- an even dozen of "I say ___, you think ___"
01. stroke-swim
02. sketch-tablet
03. poke-doughboy
04. doh-dad
05. tongue-lick
06. post-tag
07. twirl-skirts
08. fore-play
09. cup-coffee
10. curly-hair
11. swim-lake
12. snooze-snore
My hump....
My hump is hard. My hump rests on the floor in the livingroom. My hump sometimes tells me stories. My hump has many holes. My hump is black. My hump needs interaction to be useful. What is my hump?
This is my first bd insanity event and yup i'm proud of it! enjoy!!
